The pride and fear are at about the same level. After years of zillow-ing home values while watching the DIY network I finally have my own. I was informed by my agent that I had, what they refer to as “zing,” for this house. In other words, a giddy feeling that’s not necessarily based on any sort of logical evaluation. A part of me looks at my new purchase and panics, “Oh no! The zing got me! What have I done, there’s graffiti and trash everywhere?!” Then I’ll take another look and start to remember the excitement that crept over me when I walked into this house. Sure, there was a lot of “character” that I could have done without, but I saw through it. Where spray cans lie on windowsills, I see window boxes filled with flowers. Where the walls are scrawled on, I think of the fun the scrawlers had, not just how I’ll cover it up.
Of course good vibes don’t totally take away the scariness, but they put it in perspective. Any project worth doing should induce a little fear. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Do one thing every day that scares you.” I’m thinking I can take a couple days off after this purchase. But either way, this house gets me: